Have you ever thought about what is causing you stress in your life? Some common causes of stress are:
- Financial problems
- Relationship issues
- Loss of employment
- Children with social and emotional problems
- Family members with addictions
- Elderly parents or grandchildren living in the home
- Existing health issues
- Illness or loss of a loved one
- Career and business concerns
Stress can cause some very common health-related problems including fatigue, insomnia, high blood pressure, cancer, stroke, heart attacks and other illnesses. Unless you take control and learn how to manage the stress, it may lead to chronic illness and even sudden death.
The 6 Steps of Stress RELIEF can help you gain control of what is causing you stress and help you lead a more peaceful life.
1. RELAX – The key to learning how to relax is that you have to make the conscious effort to do it. Whether it is deep breathing exercises, meditation or Yoga, your mind has to consciously tell your body to relax. Using specific relaxation techniques can help you control anxiety and fear, feel more at ease and even help you sleep at night.
2. EXERCISE – Physical exercise is the good kind of stress that our bodies need, and is proven to have positive impacts on overall wellbeing. However, it is important to remember to exercise your mind, as well. This could be in the form of reading or in the form of mental exercises such as puzzles and brain teasers, or researching a favorite topic. You can use your creative imagination to write a story, poem, article or even a book.
3. LIVE, LOVE and LAUGH – Just enjoy life. Have fun. Watch a funny television show or rent a comedy movie. Discover ways to laugh with your family.
Love your family, friends and those close to you. Show gratitude and appreciation everyday for the little things they do.
And live…enjoy your life. You may have a lot of stress going on in your life right now, but when you focus on the positive aspects of your life, things begin to turn around.
4. INNER PEACE – Ways that you can find inner peace are through meditation, faith and spirituality. These are more personal and include methods that really resonate with you, such as going to church or meditating at home. Whatever your religious or spirituality preference, connect with that higher being that you trust. Having faith that things will get better will help bring more peace to your life.
5. ENVIRONMENT – This is so important to your well-being. If you have clutter around the house, papers needing to be filed, dishes in the sink or laundry to be folded, this can cause stress. Your environment can cause illness as well. You may have dust, mold and mildew that you cannot see that can be creating significant health issues for you. Studies are also indicating that high electromagnetic fields from wiring in your home, computers and appliances, can cause health problems.
6. FAMILY and FRIENDS, or other support systems – People who have support systems to help them through difficult times are much more likely to experience a reduction in their stress. Family and friends can help find solutions to problems, but also act like a sounding board to vent frustrations and offer emotional and sometimes financial support when needed. Getting a coach is an excellent way of establishing a collaborative relationship to help you develop effective strategies to gain control of your stress.
I invite you to make a list of those strategies you are going to implement and put them into action. By doing so, you are inviting gratitude, balance and tranquility into your life. Please share your comments!
On Monday, my husband and I celebrated our 27 year wedding anniversary. It’s hard to believe in some ways, but in others, it doesn’t seem that long ago. We have had some amazing adventures that I will never forget, but have also learned a few things to pass on to others.
So what have I learned over all these years? Here are just a few:
- Never take things for granted. You never know when something will change your life forever, so it is important to remember to cherish every moment you have with your children, grandchildren, family and friends. This is something you can teach your children and grandchildren whether they are living with you or not.
- Agree on discipline strategies for your children and grandchildren. If you don’t, they will get mixed messages and will not learn to make appropriate choices. Offer choices, be consistent and follow through with the consequences, but do it with love.
- Find your purpose early in life. When you know your purpose in life, you can live a purposeful life. I struggled with finding my purpose for years, and if I had understood my purpose earlier, I may have been able to help many more people in finding theirs. No regrets, I’m just passing this on to you. Help your children and grandchildren find their purpose and set some goals so they can live a purposeful life as well.
- Spend wisely and plan for your future. The economy is such an unstable part of our lives, and you never know when it is going to go down the tanker. So, plan ahead and find a professional who can help you invest in your future. Teach your children and grandchildren to do the same. Teach them “money sense.”
- Laugh and have fun. We have spent 27 years finding ways of laughing and having fun, many of which do not require a lot of money. It’s not how much money you spend, it’s the time you spend together that is important. A few of our favorite pastimes are picnics on the beach and camping in the forest. Of course, we live in Phoenix now, so the drive is a bit longer.
- Take lots of pictures. One of my hobbies is photography, so thank goodness for digital cameras! We have 21 years worth of photos and photo albums (I stopped using film about 6 years ago) in boxes. If you can, invest in a good digital camera and download your pictures to an online photo gallery. I use Picasa which is free and available with a Google email (gmail.com) account. Picasa allows you to catalog your pictures into albums and sort them however you want. You can send the link to your photo gallery to your family and friends, and share your memories with anyone anytime. Picasa also allows you to set your albums for public or private viewing, so your more personal family photos don’t have to be shared with the world.
- Pay it forward. The act of doing good deeds as repayment of good deeds you receive is something you can teach your children and grandchildren. I call these selfless acts of kindness. Remember people who have helped you by helping others in return.
These are the few that really stand out. After 27 years, we can still learn from these to pass on to the next generation, our grandchildren.
What would the world be like without grandparents? I think it would be a very sad and empty place. Whether you are a grandparent who is only able to visit your grandchildren periodically because of distance, or you are a single grandparent raising 6 grandchildren on your own, you make tremendous contributions to this world.
You have not only raised your children, but you can go beyond that by helping your grandchildren learn and grow. You are able to provide them with great insight into your past by painting a picture of your life, your experiences, your work and family values. You can also share the politics, wars, technology, music, dance and entertainment of your era, which provides tremendous educational value.
You are teachers, historians, counselors, coaches, homemakers, travelers and financial planners. You provide encouragement, self-esteem, advice, support, reassurance, shoulders to cry on, honesty, hugs, kisses, unconditional love and cookies. You are caring, understanding, sympathetic, loyal, dedicated, fun, humorous, and giving. And when the going gets tough, you’re always there, willing and able to lend a helping hand.
If you are a grandparent who is raising your grandchildren, you may not want to ask for help because, after all, you are the one that has always helped out when someone needed you. That’s why your grandchildren are there with you now.
There is nothing wrong with asking for assistance in your situation. That is why there are so many resources available to help grandparents raising grandchildren, because 1) it is a growing trend, and 2) you shouldn’t have to do it alone.
Be aware of resources available in your community as well as on the internet. Take advantage (I know…not in your vocabulary) of what they have to offer. In the right column, you’ll find some resources available that I have bookmarked for your convenience. I’m continuously updating the list, so check back often for more. You have dedicated your life to helping others, and I’m dedicating my life to helping you.
Few things are more delightful than grandchildren fighting over your lap.
~Doug Larson
For those of you who have seen my Coaching For Quality blog, this one is new. This one is dedicated to baby boomers and all other grandparents who are raising grandchildren.
You are a unique group of people. You have dedicated your lives to raising your children, and now, you’re dedicating your lives to raising your grandchildren. Out of compassion, love and unselfish acts of kindness, you have taken on a new, but also continuing roll as a parent.
Some of you may not have even known your grandchildren before they came to live with you because they were living in a distant city, or even another state. However, you did what you needed and wanted to do, and that was to ensure your grandchildren had a safe, happy and loving home in which to go after they got out of school each day. So for all of you grandparents out there, I dedicate this to you.
A grandparent’s love is there everyday,
That’s why your children’s children are with you today.
A grandparent’s work is never done,
So always make time to have more fun.
A grandparent’s life is filled with joy,
When grandchildren are around, whether girl or boy.
A grandparent’s home is warm and caring,
Your grandchildren do appreciate your giving and sharing.
A grandparent’s heart is filled with love,
Because grandchildren are like angels who were sent from above.
Whether you are Grandma or Grandpa or Nana or Pops,
Your grandchildren will always think you’re the tops.
Keep faith and hope and joy in your heart,
Because your grandchildren were blessings right from the start.
~ Kay Fontana
“The Grandcoach”
